1. What has been your longest love relationship?
My ex-husband and I may have technically been together longer than Jimi and I, but we also broke up a few times in the middle and I totally was hookin' up with other guys (before we were married), and I'm pretty sure he was hookin' up with other guys (after we were married), so I'm going to assume this question means "what's been your longest consecutive I-love-you-all-the-time-not-just-when-I'm-lonely relationship?" and that, of course, would be Jimi.
(Though I was way in love with this guy in high school- even though we only dated for like 4 months, I thought of him every day for the next, oh, 6 or 7 years. I'm also assuming the question is only asking about the sort of relationships that are mutual, not the creepy-stalker-crazy-ex-girlfriend-can't-move-on sort.)
2. What was the last gift that you received?
My friend Karen and her boyfriend Gary worked at his mom's farmer's market stand yesterday and brought home 3 bushel baskets of homegrown, organic produce. (tomatoes, eggplant, squash, cucumbers...) She called last night to say we have one waiting for us and need to come get it. Happy Random Presents Day to me!
3. What do you spend your extra cash on?
Things I shouldn't talk about on the internet in case they're watching. Eating out. Beer. Buying things for people I love. Buying more stuffed toys for my dog so he can rip out the stuffing. Giving money to guys on the street who create vivid stories, not knowing I'd give it to them without the spiel. Dirt and plants that claim to clean the air inside your house. Orchids. The Sims 3 upgrades. (Not really - I don't spend real money to get my characters new outfits or anything; but I do have the Ambitions and Adventures and I'll probably spring for the Pets when it's released in October. I'm so embarrassed.)
Oh, and getting out of debt. Maybe I should've listed that one first?
4. If you could live anywhere would you live?
If I could live anywhere, I hope I would live. Okay, I know what the question is supposed to be asking (even if it is missing a word) - but I don't know how to answer it with a location. I'd love to live on an island somewhere, or in a Utopia, but really, I'm pretty happy right where I'm at. As long as I have my Jimi, my family, my friends, my zip code doesn't matter. (I say that because where I am, in Louisville, KY, is pretty freakin' awesome - we've got a little bit of everything. Except oceanfront property.)
5. Who's your cell provider?
Cincinnati Bell. I know, I'd never heard of them before, either. My cell is provided through work, free of charge to lil' ol' me, so whatever.
6. What's your favorite mall store?
I remember when I thought Spencer's was awesome, and now I think it's dirty. I'm officially fucking old. These days, I really like the stores with the sparkles - mostly because I really hate the mall, but it's impossible to be a bitch when you're trying on thousands of dollars worth of bling.
7. What's the longest job that you've had? (No parenting does not count!)
I spent most of my twenties moving from Kentucky, to Michigan, to Nebraska, to Texas, to Kentucky - and moving jobs with each new address. My current employer took me on in June 2007, and as of Friday, my status is, as my boss put it, "I couldn't fire you." Four years isn't much of a record for a 31 year old, but it is what it is.
8. If you won the lottery, who'd you call first?
My parents, to let them know they can spend the rest of their lives doing whatever it is that makes them happy.
9. If you won, how would you spend your money after investments?
I'd hire a personal trainer and a nutritionist to get my ass in shape. Then I'd travel the world to see all the things I've dreamed of seeing. Then I'd come home to our new custom-built commune where all of our friends and family had moved and we'd start building our Utopian society.
10. When was the last time you went to church (or a religious house)?
We attended a wedding at a Catholic church in mid-June. I suggest every now and then that maybe we should get up early and go check out a random service at any random church, but sleeping in and morning sex always seem like better investments of our time.
11. What's the biggest lie that you've heard?
I think our government would be the teller, but I couldn't pinpoint any one specific falsehood - just pick anything, chances are good a large part of it will be bullshit.
12. When you go out with your friends, where do you go?
What's this "go out" of which you speak? I don't leave my house.
13. When was the last time that you cried?
Last night. I watched a documentary called The Suicide Tourist, about a man with ALS who travel across the world to kill himself with medical assistance. My heart broke for his wife as he drank the final cocktail of drugs.
14. What food do you hate?
Hamburgers, mustard, mayo, onions that aren't pureed or powdered, almost all sausage, shrimp, chicken that isn't breast meat...the list goes on and on and on.
15. What do you like best about yourself?
My luck. It's fucking awesome.