Thursday, May 12, 2011

Sweet baby squirrel!

Oh Emm Gee!!!

This cracked me the fuck up this morning.  I literally LOL'd.  I did it again just now, watching the video for a second time.  Everyone should watch this video - that little girl is so freakin' adorable.  (And I really like the part where the Mom says "fuck".)

Stacy reminded me of the lucky squirrel tails our Papaw gave us when we were kids - they came from a couple of the animals he'd hunted and killed down on the Property.  I have a hard time figuring out how we came to actually get to play with those squirrel tails - my Granny and my Momma and my Aunt Pam, they weren't germophobes or anything, but they weren't the sort to let us girls play with dead animal parts, either.  I've convinced myself that Papaw must've somehow sanitized those tails before they became mine and Stacy's; to believe otherwise just confuses me.

That story reminds me of the time he gave us rabbits feet, also fresh killed off the family farm.  Remember those dyed rabbits feet people used to carry around on their keychains (or, if you're living in certain parts of the South, the dyed rabbits feet your friends still carry around on their keychains)?  I thought those were pretty hot shit, and I really wanted one.  (I went through a phase where I collected keychains, specifically ones that said "Natalie" and the name of whatever tourist place someone who loved me had visited - even though I now realize most were likely purchased at Pilot truck stops.)  Anyhow, the rabbit foot.  I wanted one, and Papaw was always good about making sure I got just about everything I wanted, so he killed a rabbit, and before he skinned and butchered it, he cut off it's leg and gave it to me.  Now, I know that he somehow cured that leg before it came to be mine, because even if my Momma let me play with a squirrel tail, there's no fucking way she let Papaw give me a bleeding rabbit's foot.  (Also, I don't have nightmares about it, so I know it didn't go down that way.)  But I remember that rabbit's foot wasn't pink or green or purple, and it wasn't little, either - it was a big brown hind leg that once belonged to a living creature, and frankly, it freaked me the fuck out, but probably not for reasons you're thinking.  See, I wanted a cute dyed rabbit's foot that I could hang from my key-less keychain and dangle from the side of my little empty purse to show off to all my friends.  This hideous brown thing had a fucking bone sticking out the top of it!  There was no shiny silver cap to cover that reality or through which to thread a chain.  Of course I was grateful to Papaw for his efforts, and I thanked him profusely, but I never tried to show that shit to my friends in a "Look at the awesome rabbit's foot my Papaw got me!" sort of way.

Did you play with dead things when you were a kid?


  1. Oh, God, no.

    She's cute and all, but...I'd go berserker if I saw my kid playing with a dead thing.

    I seriously just watched that in horror!

  2. That was SO funny. I am at work and literally laughed out loud reading this and thinking about how a big brown rabbit leg hanging outside my daughters purse could possibly look. OMG!!! I'll watch the video when I get home since I can't get it here but holy crap that was really funny

  3. Now that I can comment I forget what I was going to say. I can assure you that it was going to be witty and hilarious. You'll just have to take my word for it. What I will say is that besides the little cutie playing with a dead squirrel and loving it so I highly love that she is just wearing her panties. I guess if you're going to play with dead animals you might as well do it in your undies.


Please don't make me cry.


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