Monday, September 13, 2010

Wake me up when it's over.

The doc pretty much confirmed what I already knew, but I have to go back for more blood work on Wednesday for the final word.  I spent all day at the hospital waiting, being poked and prodded, waiting, waiting, napping, waiting, more poking, more prodding.  Saying those awful words again and again, to new nurses who only meant well...they didn't know that I wasn't a newly expectant mom, all giddy with excitement.  Except maybe for the dark circles under my eyes.  Or the sadness that just sort of hung around me all day.  Even the waitress at lunch asked me 3 times if I was okay, despite my assurances, that yes, I am, thank you.

Blah.  I'm not going to be this way forever.  I just need to be sad for a little while.  Just for a little while.

Jimi's making some dinners.  A pork roast, with green beans and corn on the side.  Yum.  And there are whole-wheat rolls. And there's ice cream, and Dawn's delicious cookies.

I keep intending to do some retail therapy - to buy myself something pretty to make me feel better - but until I feel like actually going out around people, I'm going to eat.  Just for a day or two.  Don't judge me.  I need all the comfort I can get right now, in whatever form it may present itself.

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Please don't make me cry.


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