My boss told me once that when he got sober, he realized that he judged other people on the basis of their accomplishments, but judged himself on the basis of his intentions.
Yeah, me too. I'd never thought of it before, but when he said that, there was no question that it also applied to me.
With that said, I'm a failure. I suck at setting goals and reaching them. Wait - that's not true; I'm really good at setting goals, but I give up and quit long before they've been reached.
I can do hard things, but i don't like to. If there's a hard way to do something, but there's also an easier way that may not have exactly the same results but will be close enough, I'll always pick the easier option. And if a goal was set that only affects me - like, say, when I decided about this time last year that I was going to lose 40 pounds before my 30th birthday - well, it's really easy to give up on something if no one other than me is counting on the results.
So we went grocery shopping this weekend, and bought all sorts of noodle bowls for our lunches this week. One for each day, a different flavor each day, under $2.50 a piece. A great way to save money and not pump myself full of greasy fast-food, right?
Right. Until I realized I don't like the noodle bowls I picked out. Monday, I gave the sesame teriyaki to Kim. I hated it; she loved it. Tuesday, realizing maybe I just don't like microwave cheap teriyaki, I gave the last teriyaki flavored one to Kim, and fixed the Mushroom soup, thinking it was going to be the yummiest of the group. I ate half; didn't like it, either.
So today, day 3 of the "No Fast Food" week-long experiment, I'm having Wendy's for lunch. A half of their chicken apple pecan salad and a plain baked potato.
It's no noodle bowl.
It's fast food.
It's not fried.
And, with their Pick 2 deal they've got going on right now, it was $5.
Eff you, guilty conscience.
So yeah, I'm a failure. But it's nothing new. I'm used to it by now.
And let's be honest; a salad and a baked potato is SUCH a much better lunch than a noodle bowl. Seriously.
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Please don't make me cry.