It's not 8 a.m. yet and I've already showered and started a load of laundry. GO ME! I've got a list a mile long of things I need to get done today - we played all day yesterday, and so today there must be work:
~ Folding Laundry (yes, that is a separate item)
~ Unload dishwasher
~ Reload dishwasher
~ Take Finn for a walk
~ Grocery shopping
~ Something for dinners this week
~ Finish that Jenny Lawson book
~ Read the internets
~ Make the Bed
~ Steam floors
~ Set table
Okay, it's really not that big a list. I woke up feeling like I had a lot to do, but I think it's just a list of chores that come about from being a grownup and not living with your Mom.
My Jimi is home again and it feels like the world is back to normal. His training went well and he's excited about his new position - I'm glad he won't be fielding phone calls from angry people all day. A person can only be bitched at for so many hours a day before that shit breaks through and starts poisoning their mood. Jimi's always been good at keeping his work crazy at work, but that sort of stuff wears you down. I'm glad he's got an opportunity to do something new.
Bossman and I had a come-to-Jesus this week, and I unloaded all of my frustrations and fears and anger. I was expecting something in return, but not what I got. Not "You're the best employee I've ever had the pleasure to work with, and you're one of my best friends." Not "I've done a bad job managing and because of that, the workload in this office is terribly unbalanced. I think I tried to blame that on you," (he did) "but that's not your shortcoming as a manager, that's mine." The sales job I wanted, applied for, and was denied? Turns out the Big Bossman wants me for that job. He compared me to our two rockstar saleswomen in the South and Northwest. He told Bossman to redistribute the workload in the office so I can have time to focus on the customer service/sales aspects of my position, and to get me in a place where I can be out of the office a few times a month to visit our customers. We've filled the position I'd sought, but there are bright things on the horizon for me, and I don't feel quite so much like stabbing myself in the eye to avoid having to go to work. Months of stress fell away after one 45 minute heart-to-heart. It's like Bossman and I have been dancing, a delicate dance where the steps are tricky and the music is fast, and now the song has ended, and it turns out I've got some rhythm after all.
I love this morning. It's quiet and cool - it rained all night and so I can't cut the grass. My sweetheart is snoring softly in the bedroom, my puppy is at my feet. We've got nowhere to be except right where we are. And it's early. This is why I love getting up early - the day feels so full of possibility.
I'm going to go get started on that chore list; the sooner it's finished, the sooner I can play.