Saturday, October 15, 2016


Hi Facebook!  I've been avoiding you for days now because all of the politics makes me angry and sad and anxious.  My brain is quieter now than it has been for weeks, and I haven't dreamed about Donald or Hillary once in the last couple days.  But I also missed some great pictures and announcements and opportunities to find out what's going on in the lives of the people I love.  But I spent way more time playing with my kids and walking my dog.  Why is Facebook so good and bad both at the same time?

I got a new phone.  It seems pretty cool, but I'm still really bummed about those lost voice recordings.  So incredibly bummed.  When Jimi and I first started dating, I had a hard time understanding what he meant when he talked about attachment being the source of all pain, and how as a Buddhist, he strives to let go of attachment.  I thought he was just trying to creatively tell me he wanted to hook up with other chicks, but that wasn't the case.  He was talking real deep stuff, and while I can grasp the idea and concept, I'm really really bad at the practice and application of avoiding attachment to things.  I catch myself thinking about those lost singalongs with my sweet girl, and I get so deeply sad knowing I'll never hear them again... I have to remind myself that I enjoyed them in the moment, and again later the times I listened to them or played them for others, and it's okay that they're gone.  I have her, we will sing so many more songs together.  We will tell so many more stories.  I shouldn't waste those potential moments mourning moments that are already over.

I read too much Facebook.  It's still really noisy. 

I just decided I really do like my new phone.  So at least there's that. 

Sweet dreams.

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Please don't make me cry.


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