I used to worry constantly about what others think of me - from my earliest memories as a child, through high school, in the workplace, then on the internet. Then I met Jimi, and he loved me in the purest way a person can love another person who isn't their child - just as I am - and I stopped giving so much weight to the opinions of others when it came to forming my opinion of myself.
Still, from time to time, I find myself wondering what my image is for people who don't know me in real life, anymore or because they've never met me. I wonder what my ex-husband thinks of my Facebook profile, for instance. He sent me a friend request the day after I learned I was expecting Geneva - so he's been privy to my life after him only during the period of my life that's been full of the most awesome things. I sort of love that fact, I can't lie.
I lost my train of thought and clicked away to some other internet time-suck. There was nothing good on. I remembered my unspoken/unwritten resolution that is somewhat hazy and undefined but was something like blogging more and not leaving a million drafts hanging out there in the nether with two paragraphs and no ending. So fuck it. I'll come back and blather on some more until I've posted enough words to count as an entry and post so I can move on to more important things, like making lists and not doing the dishes.
Here's a picture of me and Geneva, from our photo session a few weeks back:
Isn't my girl beautiful? Oh, I love her so much. It's after midnight; she's 10 months old today. Time flies.
I'm sure I had bigger things to say, but I don't have the words available now. Maybe tomorrow. Sweet dreams.